K!*l The Children?

Violence can stop an unwanted behavior in the short run, but it never works well to solve problems in the long run.

I recently pulled a song out of my archives that I wrote in 2003 for a production of Aristophane’s comedic play “Lysistrata”. It was performed at our Theatricum Botanicum theater in Topanga that summer. It’s a story of how Lysistrata organized women from all the Greek city-states to agree to stop having sex with their husbands and lovers, until their men agreed to stop fighting wars with each other.  Ellen Geer updated the script to 2003, and placed it in Washington, DC. My song, “Kill The Children” was sung by the President of the United States. 

As I watched the video of the song, I was stunned to see how the attitudes and arguments presented back in 2003, are the exact same current claims we hear about the wars on the news today. This is not a funny song, but when the actors sing it in the play, it almost always elicits laughter from the audience. I think it's because we all know it's ‘not okay’ to say certain things ‘out loud’. The people laugh because it is so uncomfortable and unbelievable to hear these words spoken in public. When we hear hidden truths spoken publicly, we find that, like the women in the play, we feel a need to do something about the injustice and ignorance. We want to put an end this kind of cruel-hearted analysis and the ensuing violent behaviors. See what you think.

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KILL THE CHILDREN

What’s the point of feeding them

They smile and pretend

They’d stab us in the back you know,

They resent us in the end

You can see it in their eyes

You know the hate won’t end

They eat our food then teach their children

America’s no friend.

Kill the children!  It’s the only way

Kill the children!  Don’t let them live another day

Kill the children!  Let the mothers scream

Kill the children!  Make the world safe for our dream

You’ll be sorry if we don’t

They’ll grow up and find a way

To strike our hearts with terror

And our kids will have to pay

We can’t let the evil grow

And war is hell, it’s true

But it’s them or us you know,

We know what we have to do

Kill the children!  Don’t put it on TV

Kill the children!  If you’re scared, then you’ll agree!

Kill the children!  And kill the mothers too!

Our dream is just to make this whole world safe for me and you.

Written by Peter Alsop, ©2003 Moose School Music (BMI)

On Ebenezer’s Make Over -  from Lysistrata  -  www.peteralsop.com

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As a songwriter of songs for children and their families, I know we need to speak up and point out that violence never solves a long term problem.  Here's why, ...

As I child, my siblings and I were spanked for ‘not’ doing our chores at home. We had a ‘chore-chart’ with a list of our chores that needed to be checked off as we completed them. Our Dad arrived home at 6:o’clock, ... and for each chore that was not checked off, ... we would have to bend over, grab our ankles, and we got one whack on the bottom with a thick John Brown belt for each chore not done! You should have seen the activity around our house at 5:55!

After hearing this, a friend told me “Peter!  You were an abused child!”

“No I’m not! My father didn’t come home and thrash us or anything. I mean, ... he was very organized about it! Besides, it was my fault because I didn’t do my chores!” 

I shrugged. He smiled, then said, “It’s true that it was your responsibility to do your chores, but it was your father’s choice to hit you for not doing them.”

I thought about that. “Yeah!” ... I remember him saying, “This hurts me more than it hurts you!” I wanted say, “Okay Dad, ... give me the belt!  Grab your ankles!” Of course, that wouldn’t have been a good idea back then.

When I talk to my audiences about parenting, I usually tell them this story.

I’ve never hit my kids, and they turned out pretty great!  I stashed my Dad’s belt on top of a bookshelf and never used it.  But don't you think that as I went through my parenting life as a father, ... occasionally I might have looked longingly over at the belt on the bookshelf ?   My audience would laugh because they understood.  And I’d say, “Exactly!  But I never picked that belt up, because I didn’t want to teach my kids that it’s okay to use violence to solve a problem!”

There were a number of studies done in the fifties with rats in mazes. In one of them, the experimenters put a rat at the start point of the maze, then put a piece of cheese at the end of the maze. With a stop-watch they timed the rat, to see how long it took them to get to the cheese. Some rats were very quick, and some took a long time. The experimenters thought they might be able to help a rat learn to navigate the maze faster, if they punished it whenever it made a wrong turn. They electrified the metal floor, and each time a rat made a wrong turn, they’d hit a button and electrify their little bare rat-feet. Well, ... it kind of worked, because after a few shocks, the rat’s behavior changed, and it stopped making wrong turns. The new problem was that the rat refused to move at all. It just froze in place. I’m pretty sure the rat was thinking,

“Oooww!  What was THAT!? I'm not taking another step! That big person up there will just push the button again if I make a move!”

So the experimenters learned that punishment will stop a rat from making wrong turns, but they also learned that punishment cuts down the exploratory behaviors needed to help the rat learn how to solve their problem and get out of the maze.

Violence and wars can stop unwanted behaviors in the short run, but they never work well to solve the big problems in the long run. This experiment made it clear to me, that our job as parents, as adults, is to find non-violent ways to help our kids and others explore their life and terrain, so they can discover how to find balance in their own lives. This is a relevant lesson for families, organizations, countries and our world.

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